I’ve been known to disembowel clocks that tick (not disarm ticking clocks – that I leave to the brave people of the Bomb Squad). I’ve also run around strange houses and tightened taps almost to the point of stripping the thread because I cannot abide what I call ‘Lazy Person Water Torture’. I recently saw an episode of some series where the main protagonist takes a golf club to a dripping tap and then his wife repairs the tap – how’s that for an equal household!
Now you know what to do when it comes to your water cooler having a dripping spigot – you just call us.
In these other instances however, I’m not quite sure what remedy to suggest. Have a gander:
When a truck carrying construction glue collided with a bus in Chengdu City, China, it dowsed the street with its sticky contents. Firefighters tried – unsuccessfully – to remove the glue by diluting it with water guns and some observers even were stuck in it. The adhesive was finally dissolved using chemicals.
In the past few years, honeybees have spilled onto highways in Montana, Canada and California, where 10 million to 16 million angry buzzers responded by stinging firefighters, police and drivers. Honeybee hives are regularly shipped to farms around the country to pollinate crops, since colony collapse disorder has decimated local bee populations.
Apparently, years ago, there was a lot of mackerel transported from Devon and Cornwall to Grimsby in tipping trailers and a few times the locking catches were not strong enough and the loads ended up on the road where the truck drivers parked for their rest. On one occasion a car stopped sharply for no apparent reason and the fish carrying lorry stopped just as quickly and the fishy load came over the lorry and into the car.
While it may not grow on trees, money has flooded public streets on multiple occasions. In 2004, an armoured truck crashed on the New Jersey Turnpike, spilling $2 million in coins. In 2005, another truck caught fire in Alabama, spilling $800,000 in quarters. And in 2008, a driver on his way to the Miami Federal Reserve fatally crashed, spewing $185,000 in nickels.
And, my favourite:
In 2000, millions of the popular LEGO plastic toys went for a swim when a ship hit by a rogue wave dumped a container full of them overboard. The beloved blocks have now bobbed through the Northwest Passage to the shores of Alaska, one scientist calculates.
I have this vision of remote mini communities somewhere in the world who now have brightly coloured homes due to this. But that’s just me.
Perhaps you won’t feel as bad about mistreating your water cooler after reading about these rather epic spills. That said, be nice to your water cooler! They do after all, keep you hydrated rain or shine.
