by Fern Shaw | Feb 9, 2015 | water cooler, Water Coolers
I was idly sitting on Ollie’s desk (a colleague), pretending that his having a new desk top water cooler (the Aquaid-400-Desktop-Water-Cooler no less – nothing but the best for ol’ Ollie it would seem) didn’t make me green with envy – I mean, what’s he got that I haven’t? – swinging my legs and acting all nonchalant when my cartoon vision brain flashed some images at me. No, no Cyanide & Happiness (do yourself a favour and look the strip up), visions of raining destruction and mayhem down on unenviable Ollie, but how very weird ‘O’ words are.
Think about it. ‘O’ words (and by ‘O’ words I mean words that begin with an ‘O’, not words that contain an ‘O’ – catch up! catch up slowpoke!) are just, well … odd. More than that, a lot of ‘O’ words just sound strange too or; their meaning is strange.
Some prime examples:
Obsidian – A hard, dark, glasslike volcanic rock formed by the rapid solidification of lava without crystallisation. say it aloud – Ob-sid-eean. Doesn’t is just sound mysterious and mercurial and other wordly?
Onomatopoeia – This means the formation of a word from a sound associated with what is named (e.g., cuckoo, sizzle).
Odd – Such a short stumpy little word and often used to describe much bigger things deserving surely a larger, more eloquent description. e.g. saying that Jack the Ripper was ‘odd’ just doesn’t quite cut it (sorry, very bad pun).
Ovoid – Egg-shaped. I suppose egg shaped is an odd (haha) shape and there deserves an odd (ha haaaaaa!) sounding descriptive word.
And my current favourite:
Obsequious – This means to be servilely ingratiating or fawning.
Have you also noticed how the meaning or description of each ‘o’ word is rarely straightforward? Hmm … in an alternate universe I’m sure there’s some bigger meaning, but frankly my dear, my grey matter’s a bit sponged out now.
I’m going to keep things simple, and come up with a new plan of action as far as Ollie’s desktop water cooler is concerned. I’ve always had my eye on the H-Duo, one of AquAid’s newest cool(ers) on the block /desk / countertop, so I’m off to do the obsequious thing with the powers-that-be and see if that’ll score me my own lime green desktop!
by Fern Shaw | Jan 1, 2015 | Health and Hydration, water cooler, Water Coolers
I personally don’t ‘do’ New Year’s resolutions. Why not, you ask? Well, think about it: you put yourself under inordinate amounts of stress (which kind of puts paid to resolutions like, ‘I won’t stress as much’) which pretty much sets the pace for the rest of the year, which means that your resolution typifies the identical behaviour for the previous year. Make sense? It should.
Just in case you misguidedly decide on making New Year’s resolutions, please, Louise, try to make them original – none of this ‘I’m going on diet’ nonsense. ‘Drink more water’ should now, of course, be a given, so none of that as a special effort either!
To get you going I found a few which made me snort with laughter:
*I will find out why the correspondence course on ‘Mail Fraud’ that I purchased never showed up.
*Eat more nice things like sweets, Big Macs, popcorn and ice cream. Eat less rubbish like fresh fruit, vegetables and soy nuts.
*New Years Resolution: do a series of jazz-flute instructional tapes. Maybe I’ll call it “Ron Burgundy: A Jazz Flute-orial.” ~ Ron Burgundy
*My New Year resolution is: 1024 by 968 pixels!
*Learn what the heck “resolution” means.
*Learn more resolve.
*My New Year’s resolution is to be less prefect ~ Jim Gaffigan
and my personal favourite:
*My New Year’s resolutions are:
- Stop making lists
- Be more consistent.
- Learn to count.
However you choose to ring in the New Year, may we wish you a healthy, happy and prosperous year ahead.
by Fern Shaw | Dec 25, 2014 | water cooler, Water Coolers
Talking about Christmas time again, Fern? Yes, I believe I am. You were well warned, dear blog follower that I really do love Christmas time.
So far, we know that Ian Thorpe, co-founder of The Africa Trust, will be with the Maasai eating a slap of meal of wood fire roasted goat, no salt.
We know that the great Plum Pudding brandy ignition at the water cooler station is also not happening (rude!) and that much merriment will occur; many mince pies, turkeys, eggnog, roast tatties and marzipan will be consumed – way hay!
But that’s at home on the islands. What unusual traditions are there around the globe that we don’t know about?
On the 4th of December, women in the Czech Republic place a cherry twig under water. If it blooms before Christmas Eve it means she will marry in the next year.
In Australia, Santa often pulls up on the beach on his surfboard. Carollers also gather in masse in major cities to sing by candlelight, and people decorate their homes with ‘Christmas Bush’, a native plant.
In Finland, tradition calls for families to stop by the cemetery and commemorate the dead. It’s also typical for families to lunch on porridge with an almond hidden inside – and the one who finds the almond sings a song.
In India, those who celebrate Christmas decorate banana or mango trees.
Before going to bed, children in France put their shoes by the fireplace. They hope that Pere Noel, France’s Santa, puts gifts in their shoes. He also hangs small toys, nuts and fruits on the tree.
Christmas starts in Oaxaca, Mexico, with a parade of people walking down lantern-lit streets, and knocking on every door to re-enact Mary and Joseph’s search for shelter. Then, they break ceramic plates near the cathedral to signify the year’s end.
The “Tió de Nadal” is a popular Christmas tradition in Catalonia. The log is typically propped up on sticks, and children are encouraged to feed it and cover it with blankets on the nights leading up to Christmas. On Christmas day, the log is placed in the fireplace and beaten with sticks so that it drops small presents.
And to end off, just in case you are traveling abroad over the festive season, here are some rather lovely expressions with which to wish people a Merry Christmas:
In Akan (Ghana) Afishapa
In Zimbabwe Merry Kisimusi
In Afrikaans (South Africa) Geseënde Kersfees
In Zulu (South Africa) Sinifisela Ukhisimusi Omuhle
In Swazi (Swaziland) Sinifisela Khisimusi Lomuhle
In Sotho (Lesthoto) Matswalo a Morena a Mabotse
In Swahili (Tanzania, Kenya) Kuwa na Krismasi njema
In Amharic (Ethiopia) Melkam Yelidet Beaal
In Egyptian (Egypt) Colo sana wintom tiebeen
In Yoruba (Nigeria) E ku odun, e hu iye’ dun!
However you choose to celebrate this time of year, I wish you, in the words of Ringo Starr, “Peace and love, peace and love.”
by Fern Shaw | Dec 24, 2014 | water cooler, Water Coolers
The Tradition of the Christmas Pudding
We all should know by now that I have a great love of food, celebration, festivals, traditions – I can wax lyrical for hours. Waxing the floor (i.e. domestic work), not so much.
I was hard pressed to choose what Christmas dish to blog about, but seeing as there are so many, I had to choose, so I girlied up and made a decision.
*Christmas (or Plum) Pudding is the traditional end to the British Christmas dinner. But what we think of as Christmas Pudding, is not what it was originally like.
Christmas pudding originated as a 14th century porridge called ‘frumenty’ that was made of beef and mutton with raisins, currants, prunes, wines and spices. This would often be more like soup and was eaten as a fasting meal in preparation for the Christmas festivities.
By 1595, frumenty was slowly changing into a plum pudding, having been thickened with eggs, breadcrumbs, and dried fruit and given more flavour with the addition of beer and spirits. It became the customary Christmas dessert around 1650, but in 1664 the Puritans banned it as a bad custom.
In 1714, King George I re-established it as part of the Christmas meal, having tasted and enjoyed Plum Pudding. By Victorian times, Christmas Puddings had changed into something similar to the ones that are eaten today.
Although Christmas Puddings are eaten at Christmas, some customs associated with the pudding are about Easter. The decorative sprig of holly on the top of the pudding is a reminder of Jesus’ Crown of Thorns that he wore when he was killed. Brandy or another alcoholic drink is sometimes poured over the pudding and lit at the table to make a spectacular display. This is said to represent Jesus’ love and power.
In the Middle Ages, holly was also thought to bring good luck and to have healing powers. It was often planted near houses in the belief that it protected the inhabitants.
During Victorian times, puddings in big and rich houses were often cooked in fancy moulds, like those one would pour jelly into. These were often in the shapes of towers or castles. Normal people just had puddings in the shape of balls. If the pudding was a bit heavy, they were called cannonballs.
Putting a silver coin in the pudding is another age-old custom that is said to bring luck to the person that finds it. In the UK the coin traditionally used was silver ‘six pence’.
The tradition seems to date back to the Twelfth Night Cake which was eaten during the festivities on the ‘Twelfth Night’ of Christmas (the official end of the Christmas celebrations). Originally a dried pea or bean was baked in the cake and whoever got it, was ‘king or queen’ for the night. There are records of this practice going back to the court of Edward II (early 1300s). The bean was also sometimes a silver ring of small crown. The first coins used were a Silver Farthing or penny. After WW1 it became a threepenny bit and then a sixpence.
I remember with great fondness, the pouring and lighting of the brandy over the Christmas Pud (only time I could ever stomach brandy) and then the anticipation of carefully searching your slice to see if you had the lucky silver piece in it. I’ve put the suggestion forward to HOD, Mrs Furtheringstoke, to see if we could have a Christmas pud lighting ritual around the water cooler before we close up shop this year, but, meanie that she is, as soon as she heard me mention ‘brandy’ and ‘set the pud alight’, she deep sixed that idea. Pfft! It’s fine though, I’ve already started up a secret society of the Papa Uniform Delta. Instructions to follow. Foxtrot, Echo, Romeo, November, out.
*excerpts from a delightful article at Why Christmas
by Fern Shaw | Nov 7, 2014 | Water Coolers
I read this article a while ago:
*‘US-born neuroscientist John O’Keefe has jointly won the 2014 Nobel Prize for medicine for discovering the brain’s navigation system. Is it any surprise then that he loves Ordnance Survey maps, writes Luke Jones.
O’Keefe came to the UK from the US in the late 1960s. He was supposed to stay for only two years as part of post-doctoral study. He decided to relocate for good.
The 74-year-old told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme that he was “very attracted to many aspects of British culture”.
Two aspects that he named were the NHS and the Ordnance Survey map. “I like walking on the weekends and finding my way around,” said the professor who found that the brain has an “inner GPS system” in 1971 by discovering nerve cells that help create maps.
Simon Garfield, author of On the Map, agrees with O’Keefe that OS maps are an integral part of British culture.
“Ordnance Survey maps were originally inspired by 18th Century cartography in France,” he says. “But they’ve been associated with sodden walks in the Cairngorms and the Lakeland Fells for so long that they’ll always be thought of as British as roast beef and Big Daddy. What else makes them so? Their indefatigable finicky detail and their historic quirkiness. The maps show bracken and drinking fountains, not something you see much of on satnav.”
So perhaps these are two of the many reasons that we enjoy maps so much. I have a third – the idea of being lost and ‘seeing where the day takes me’ has never really appealed to me all that much. I like to know where I am and if I have a destination, I like to see how I’m going to get there. So having a map is really important to me.
With this in mind, I’m staging a little experiment the next time I’m at our water cooler. I’m going to unfold a map and ask all those that approach if they can find a point on the map and see the reactions. Will it be the time old chestnut where the men will harrumph and pore eagerly over the map eschewing any help and the women will refuse to even look at it or will I be surprised? I shall report back anon. J
*excerpt from an article in the BBC Magazine Monitor
by Fern Shaw | Oct 23, 2014 | Water, Water Coolers
Recently a real and FB friend posted something on my page about listing your top 10 books to read ever or that had a huge influence on your life.
Now as a complete and utter bookworm, believe it or not, I was stumped. A wee bit ironic, that – a wordsmith / blogista without words. Why though? Well, I suppose it’s a little like this – bookworm envy I’d call it. When I read through said friend’s list of what her top 10 were, I saw how inspirational and life affecting they all were. My top 10, not so much.
The reasons are that I have an attention span of a goldfish or what the purported memory span of a goldfish is – 5 seconds … sorry, what? See, like that.
Somehow, my goldfish brain made the connection between water and books and The Wind in the Willows (author – Kenneth Grahame). I was very fortunate to grow up in a household of bookworms, and British classics abounded. The book I had was illustrated by the incredibly gifted E. H. Shepard and his illustrations just brought the magic of the book to life even more.
Anyhow, once my brain had made this wind, willows and water connection I started wondering about the volume of books (fiction) had water in the title. Even specifying fiction, it soon became apparent that I’d bitten off far more than I could digest. Digest, geddit? As in Reader’s Digest. Before your time? Sorry for you as they say in my neck of the woods.
From Like Water for Chocolate to Ring of Bright Water, there are thousands of watery books, more than you can shake a stick at. I’m not even going to go there.
I think I’ll rowboat race my office chair down to around the water cooler and compile my 10 best ever list there. Not a Herculean task as watery books, but close.
